Tuesday, January 15, 2013

TMI Tuesday #15 "Uh.. negative. I am a meat popcicle."

Long Ramblings of Nonsense and Things-you-don't-really-care-about-but-read-anyway Edition

Yesterday morning, (that was Monday)
Our little town had a pleasant (by pleasant I mean completely unpleasant) surprise

Here goes the events 
and my inner-thoughts and ramblings of a nonsense, half asleep brain. 

Outside temp?
-20 degrees
wait, shouldn't I be dead?
The power goes out 
oh no! I can't use my sewing machine! 
(.....because I always sew every morning at 5am??...uh...)

The deathly chill of the freaking impossibly freezing cold air continues to seep into my house uninhibited by the silent heater.
Why am I so cold? Oh yeah, the heater isn't on. Why? Because the power is out.... 



But why won't the heater turn on??

Groggily fall out of bed, stumble around trying to find a flashlight. Currently using cell phone to illuminate my situation.Sluggishly comment to The Mister on the current state of things.

I'm so cold. I'm going to die. I am a meat popcicle
 (watch this... best movie and line, EVERRRRRR!)   

Find flashlights. By this time Sunshine is awake and repeatedly saying "The lights are broken."  
He's confused but totally jazzed that things are different and exciting. 

Keep clicking button on flashlight, willing the batteries to not be dead.
Oh that's okay, I'll just light a candle. Oh wait, we don't have any candles. I think I saw something on Pinterest that said you could shove some wick into a can of Crisco and it'll work as a candle. I'll look it up. Oh wait, I can't use the internet because our router uses electricity and I still have a dumbphone (aka not a smartphone). I think I remember how it works. 
Oh wait.... 
we don't have any matches... 
....or wick... 

   The Mister and I notice a light coming from somewhere. Sunshine has found and located his light from the children's tool bench we gave him a couple years ago for Christmas.
The Mister snatches it up so he can keep getting ready for school 
(with Sunshine's permission, of course) 

Sunshine rustles through his toys
I am wrapped in blankets, not moving from the sofa. 
I am so cold. I hope this doesn't last too long. I am so cold.  
The sun will rise soon, right?.....

What if it doesn't rise?    

Click! Sunshine has found his mini-dollarstore-AAAbattery flashlight I threw into his Super Hero Kit. 
Seriously? My kid is way more prepared than I am. 
Working adult flashlights=zero
Working toy flashlights=two

The Mister is showered, dressed and completely ready for school. Now that he is out of things to do he starts excitedly rambling about:
 zombie apocalypse
 strategic plans to take-over and rule Walmart if/when needed
 wondering how much gas we have in the car
 commenting that The Bird is still asleep and could, in fact be, a zombie

I am half asleep on the sofa.
Okay, he's mostly joking. But partly of serious. And kind of freaking me out. What if this was it? What if this was for real? 
I just watched The Book of Eli.... how did they make things work after 30 years? 


Okay, I can barter. 
But what? 
I want to keep the food and water of course.....

Toys! We have lots of toys.... I wonder what I could get for the plastic dinosaurs?........
Wait, what in the helicopter am I talking about?

I'm up and organizing things. Trying to make phone calls, putting the milk and other perishables outside, filling pitchers and extra water containers, contacting the neighbors and gathering information.
In other words, acting like a real adult should. 

Power back on. 
I want to check my facebook.



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